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Wetherspoons say a big ‘fuck you’ to dry January

Duzzy Duzzer by Duzzy Duzzer
January 4, 2019
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Wetherspoons is saying a big fuck you to dry January and are holding a sale to tempt all the alcoholics and social drinkers back into to their dark sticky grasp between the 3rd and 17th of January.

Forget trying to get any kind of a handle on your habit, there’s the whole year ahead for that, but there’s cheap booze available now and for the next 14 days!

A quote taken from the wetherspoons website states:

“Department stores and shops hold their sales in January, so it is the perfect time to have a sale in the pub too,” says John Hutson, Wetherspoon’s chief executive. “The range of drinks on sale in the pub is aimed at suiting a wide variety of tastes – and I believe that the January sale will prove popular with customers.”

However, according to alcoholchange.org, out of a sample of people who took part in dry January:

88% reported saving money

71% reported better sleep

67% reported having more energy

and

58% reported having lost weight.

However JD wetherspoons doesn’t care about any of that! They want bums on seats, your cash in their tills and your puke in the corner or their familiar aroma may have died out come February.

So abandon those sale frenzied loved ones in Primark and/or don’t wait for the weekend and go sup a cheeky one.

Or don’t. And go dry. I don’t care.

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